Live

Reflections on losing yet another friend to cancer.

As a quilter, I considered finding organizations to make comfort quilts for, in honor of my friend. I also thought about chemo caps, which she had informed us should only be called "caps". I had gone through this early last month when I learned a former coworker had lost his battle.

When we see our peers reaching the end of their journeys, we sometimes think of what we should do differently in our lives, how we can best honor them.

My mind wandered while I sewed yesterday, when tears had stemmed enough for thought to process. I had the chance a year ago to meet my quilting friends, including the one who just passed. I had let the chance slide by, mumbling the usual excuses of no time and no money.

The truth is that now is the only time we have, and there is no price you can put on being with friends and family.

If you are moved to raise funds for diseases or contribute to a cause in any way, that is great. But the best way we can honor their lives is to live ours.

Really live. Each acid-forming moment stuck in traffic. Every citrus-scented spring breeze. Laughter. Tears. Chocolate. Sunshine. Backaches. They are all a gift.

As the stress builds or the giggles overflow, give thanks. Then get back to living.

Now.

For the Birds

This weather is for the birds.

There are areas of Southern California where more rain has fallen in recent days that they had in the entire year of 2007! It's wet out. And the San Fernando Valley is not set up for this much water.

Storm drains are running, but the water still flows through half a lane of traffic. Where roads usually narrow from parked cars and trash cans, and commuters usually think, "Yeah, I'm in a good mood, I'll pull over so you can get through here first," we now smile and ponder, "Sure, sucker, you go first through that puddle and I'll wait to see if you make it."

The morning walkers and joggers are nowhere to be seen. Moms and strollers on the way home from school drop offs are now moms and cars.

Yet, as I crawled through the flooded road by the peacock place, where peacocks, chickens, geese and ducks sun usually themselves in the horse arena, I saw a goose in the wading pool, splashing away merrily. Several others stood in line in the downpour as if waiting their turn.

I guess it is all a matter of viewpoint.

Living Mindfully

I don't make New Year's resolutions, and technically this is all a result of having the doctor tell me that all of my ails are stress related, but as 2007 came to a close I realized that I am not really living my life. I am rushing through it.

Once again I find myself focusing on living mindfully, experiencing the moment. Whether quilting, writing, reading or just being, I need to be aware of what is happening.

As I begin, this means not entering into projects with a deadline. Quilt swaps and challenges are fun, but not when I save them 'til the last moment to complete. Writing toward a deadline lately seems to mean a rushed story that lacks much.

I will take time to explore and learn. I will let the story direct me instead of trying to force it into a mold. I will allow first drafts and learning quilts to have flaws, and watch for improvement as I go.

Even my diet has become mindless. How can my body deal properly with stress when I can't even say what I fed it?

I might not accomplish as much, but in the long run I will have projects I can be proud of, that show my enjoyment for what I do.

Isn't that what life is about? Enjoyment?